Summer break ended on Monday as about 80 of us from the School of Education returned to an empty campus to begin our second student teaching seminar. The K-12 district in our city starts next Monday and so begins the 2011/2012 school year. Like most summers, I capped off the break with a trip to my parent's cabin in Idaho where I always reflect a little on the past year.
Outwardly, not much has changed in the past 12 months. I still have the same apartment, though all new roommates. I drive the same car, go to the same school, generally eat the same foods, gather with the same church community, listen to the same music, wear the same clothes, have the same haircut, hang out with similar friends, etc. But in two big areas of my life--education and faith--my worldviews have shifted dramatically. My old ways of knowing the world have been broken. I feel like I'm stumbling around a bit, aware of the new direction I want to go in, but a little unsure of how to let go of what I've known. I haven't talked about it much because I have trouble finding words to describe the change. I've mentioned some of the things I've learned through my Urban Education and Social Justice masters program.
How do I unlearn 6 years of viewing urban students through the lens of their deficits (the skills they lack) rather than their assets (skills they bring to the class)? How do I unlearn my unconsciously held belief that my middle class values are superior to those of urban youth? How do I unlearn the idea that what urban youth need to succeed are the same things that brought me success in high school? What do I do with my White privilege? What do I do with this desire to work for social justice while at the same time realizing I know and understand very little about what it means to be oppressed?
I ask these questions because what I've known for 27 years of my life is creating friction with what I've learned and studied for the past year. I don't ask these questions because I feel guilty. I ask these questions because I am wrestling with big ideas that shape my everyday actions. I know that white privilege is real, so what does that mean when I walk out my door in the morning?
1 comment:
There's no "like" button here! I like it. How have your views of faith changed, Sarah? Are they influenced by your conversations about social justice, white privilege, etc., or something else? I'm curious to hear what you're reading and thinking about. I think it would encourage the rest of us. :-) Tell me more....
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